STOP THE PRESSES 📚

What’s up winos!!!

An email on a Saturday? That can only mean one thing. Big news at Parched HQ.

Or two big newses (newses?), as a matter of fact. I’ll tell you the first one first (naturally), but then you have to promise to come back here for the second one. Promise? Okay.

Saturday emails usually mean we’ve had something exciting roll through the door. While that does sum up a typical day in the warehouse, there’s exciting and exciting. We couldn’t possibly have any Labet in stock. Could we?

Now that’s over with and your wallets are considerably lighter, on to the real news.

Introducing…

PARCHED MAGAZINE!!

Isn’t that more exciting than Labet? Lol.

We started kicking around the idea of creating a magazine in 2023, which should tell you a thing or two about a) how busy it is round these parts or b) how unparalleled our procrastination skills are. Or both. Either way, we finally started getting our heads down and scribbling away late last year, and I am beyond excited that it’s finally finished (mostly coz I can’t proofread it one more time. If you spot a typo, well, no you didn’t). This must be what it feels like when you have a baby (literally, with no differences whatsoever). That’s certainly how I treated the test copy when it arrived, carrying it around the bar with me, cover ostentatiously facing outwards, making everyone wash their hands before they touched it. I learned a lot (a lot) while putting it together - mostly why graphic designers exist and why we probably should have hired one - and typesetting it shaved about ten years off my life, but it was worth it. I think.

Parched Magazine is a quarterly publication of our general musings, ramblings and recommendations about wine. Basically, it’s a longer, printed form of these emails - and I know you love these emails. As with all things we do, there's something in there for everyone, whether you're a proper cork dork or a total novice. There's a bit of science, a bit of opinion, and a lot of average chat. It's a good read, if we say so ourselves. Issue 001 features an interview with Domaine Ratte by Jura expert Wink Lorch, an in-depth explanation about why you're wrong about Riesling, and a re-telling of one magical, hedonistic trip to Austria. There’s a transcript of our weekly staff blind tastings (mostly me just rinsing Fionn), a dorky explanation of WTF flor is, and a list of my personal recommendations for when you find yourself needing to throw a drink in soemone’s face. There’s some alt wine suggestions for those of you who are stuck in a drinking rut, some tips on how to roast the perfect chicken (and what to drink with it) and a deep dive into Chardonnay. Plus a lot more.

So where can I BUY this magical collector’s item, I hear you screaming? Right here. Or go here if you want to buy this magical collector’s item plus a couple of our fave wines featured in the issue, so you have something to drink while you better yourself. Or if you’re more of an in-person girlie, we’re throwing a little launch party for it at the bar next Thursday, which will basically just be business as usual in the bar except there will be copies of it plastered all over the place, and we’ll be opening some special bottles to christen it (aka the sort of bottles that go straight onto Dan’s desk, never to be touched by me or anyone else).

Without getting all teary-eyed, I’m wary of making this sound like a one-woman show - and while I did do the majority of the ‘moving commas around pointlessly’ work (and that’s only because I was too precious to let anyone help me), this is an unbelievable team effort. There’s stellar writing in here from Fionn, Hannah and Alex, and even an uncharacteristically heartfelt opening letter from Dan, whose mad idea this was in the first place. And there’s beautiful artwork from my mate Kelly who I used to live with in New York (dId I mEnTiOn I uSeD tO LiVe in NEw YoRk?). I won’t link her socials here coz she mostly posts pictures of trash she finds on the street. Arty, right?

I’ll stop wanging on now. But I really hope you love it as much as we do.

If you want to tell me how much you love it (or give us some ideas for the next issue), I made a little (very little) survey here. Let me have it (but be nice <3). After all, this magazine, like everything we do, is for you guys. And we want to give the people what they want.

Okay I will actually stop wanging on now. LOVE YOU GUYS SM.

xoxo

Megan